. . . with family blessings

From Rebecca Skinner
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member
www.celebratinglifeschapters.com

At this time of the year, couples that are thinking of getting married often start to make plans.

Do we have small an intimate or big and flashy? A ceremony within a religious tradition, one with religious elements or one that focuses their personal spiritual beliefs and values about relationship and family?

The difficulty with big and flashy can be the cost - sometimes an amount that would make a great deposit on a house or purchase a new car outright!

From Rebecca Skinner
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member
www.celebratinglifeschapters.com

Animals provide companionship, acceptance, emotional support and unconditional love.

They become part of our family, a much loved friend, and a large part of our lives. So when they’re no longer with us, it’s quite normal to feel an intense sorrow and the pain of loss and separation.

A memorial service embraces the grieving process, acknowledges a special relationship with a pet and offers comfort to those that have loved and lost. It is also a chance to celebrate their life and to remember all the happy times together. Anatole France, a French poet, journalist, and novelist famously remarked: “Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened.”

The third Celebrant initiated Community Memorial Service was held on Wednesday 5th December in Ferntree Gully, Melbourne.  Robyn O'Connell, Funeral Celebrant, headed up a small, but dedicated team of celebrants to once again organise a memorial service for the community in Melbourne. 

2012 saw the first celebrant organised Mother's Day and Father's Day Services, and now a Christmas Service "Reflect ~ Remember" can be added to the list. 

Several highly respected celebrants dedicated their time to share their feelings and help those in our community, who find Christmas

Many people do not realise that just because a Naming ceremony is not a "Christening" the style of the ceremony does not have anti-god nor bland.

By Pat Slee
Civil Marriage and Family Celebrant
Brisbane and Suburbs Queensland
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member

 http://www.spotlightstars.com.au

What a great day to be a Celebrant..

A Naming Ceremony for a little lad, with all of his family all around in a beautiful location on the headland at Elliott Heads in Queensland.The request was for a "Spiritual.. not Religious" ceremony, so I dug into my English Heritage and borrowed from the ancient Wiccan philosophies.

I used the aspect of the 4 Elements as blessings and we (the little one's mother that is..) decorated the 4 Bears to reflect this powerful imagery.

From Robbie Fincham CMC

Melbourne Civil Marriage and Family Celebrant
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member
Vice Chairperson TCN Inc
www.robbiefincham.com.au

EMIKO AND PETER - 2012 GOLD ROSE ENTRANTS 193

On a beautifully sunny spring afternoon in Melbourne in October this year I had the pleasure of conducting the marriage between Emiko and Peter, incorporating a family blending ceremony.  Family and friends gathered on the banks of the Yarra River in Kew where the oldest operating boathouse in Victoria stands - the Studley Park Boathouse.  Being only a 10 minute drive from central Melbourne, you could be mistaken from thinking you were somewhere in the country, so natural is the setting with picturesque views of the Yarra River and the perfect setting for their ceremony.

Emiko was given away by her Father, who had flown in from Japan for the special occasion.

Losing a loved one to death is hard. That loved one's absence is obvious - especially on those occasions when family and friends come together to celebrate their birthdays, anniversaries, shared beliefs or shared community times set aside for holidays.

Such times can be very lonely for those whose depth of grief is still acute. Being sad amongst others who are contented and happy can make that loneliness particularly painful.

Read More

From Rebecca Skinner
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia Celebrant Member
www.celebratinglifeschapters.com

Many cultures have celebrated a young person’s ‘coming-of-age’, and it is still marked in the Jewish community as a Bar and Bat Mitzvah, when boys turn 13 and girls 12 and in Korea by the Confucian ‘Gwallye’ from ages 15 upwards. But in Western cultures this tradition is all but ignored. The Celebrants and Celebrations network thinks it is high time to reintroduce this important ceremony.

One of the great things about the Ask A Celebrant section is the ability for couples and families to put their stories and photos about their ceremonies on our website.

I've just found this great entry from this year's ASKACELEBRANT Gold Rose Promotion. It is entry number 255.

The couple Brian and Liz have shared their photos from their Easter Sunday wedding.

Liz says " .... our theme was 'Rainbow of Love'.

As you can see this was represented by the colours :)

With families so geographically scattered and all of us leading such busy lives, it makes the gathering of family and friends all the more important.
 
That’s why the Celebrants and Celebrations Network encourages people to Party with a Purpose.

The association’s doesn’t believe we should have to wait until an occasion like Christmas or a wedding to get together, but that we create our own special occasions, organising  memorable and meaningful celebrations that touch hearts and enhance lives.
 

Civil Funerals . . .

QUOTE: From Sydney Morning Herald.

THE popularity of I Did It My Way as a funeral song shows a ''vulgar egotism'' exists in society, the Anglican Archbishop of Sydney, Peter Jensen, says.

In his last presidential speech before retirement, Dr Jensen said society's shift towards ''deadly individualism'' had been driven by material wealth and technological mastery.

The cost of individualism, and the shift to self-love, had consequences for the quality of our community, family life and how we treat death. That was evident in the choice of ''our swan song of this generation'', Frank Sinatra's classic I Did It My Way, Dr Jensen said in his speech, titled ''Last Words''.

Reference: http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/gods-way-smarter-than-sinatras-says-jensen-20121008-279nb.html

Yes I would agree with many people, that the challenge for us all is to balance our needs as an individual with the needs of our community.

I find Jensen's comments confusing. I understood that Christianity was one of the major promoters of the need to respect each individual - for the need to support and promote human rights. Otherwise, where a community feels threatened by a few or even by the one, as in the recent shooting of the 14 year old Pakistani school-girl, Malala Yousafzai, not just one but large section of humanity are devalued.

This morning I watched with great pride as one of my colleagues, Kevin Clune, commemorated the 10th Anniversary of the Bali Bombings, in Kings Park, Perth. The sensitivity and empathy that was shown by Kevin was outstanding. 

The ceremony acknowledged the loss and the ongoing pain that those that were there still experience, not forgetting those who lost family members/friends, as well as inspiring hope for the future. 

Cutting the broadcast short to enable the Victorian service to be shown was so disappointing.  Melbourne's service was solemn with little connection to those who still bear the scars.  It is interesting that different faiths were invited to participate - but where was the civil celebrant who represents people with little or no faith?  There was, what I believe an inappropriate reading from Ecclesiastes 'A time to be born, a time to die'.  While this may be appropriate for someone who has led a long and fulfilled life, how does that relate to someone whose life was taken in an act of terrorism? 

For that matter, how many of those who were affected were regular church goers?

I should make note here that with the coverage ABC24 hours had, I have not seen the complete service anywhere.  What was easy to pick up though was the tone.  Victoria - Amazing Grace. WA - Wishing you were here (Pink Floyd). 

They were young people who lost their lives, which was the most appropriate? 

A civil celebrant creates, writes and presents a ceremony - they have no doctrine to follow, nor any constraints, other than common decency, and yet when are they invited to be involved in such services? 

Ministers from many faiths are invited as not to offend anyone. 

I am a full time civil funeral celebrant, if faith was so important to the majority of people, why are 60% of funerals now conducted by civil celebrants like myself? 

I'm not saying we should not have church involvement, I'm just asking why those 60% of people who chose a celebrant are not represented by a Civil Celebrant? 

There are many civil celebrants who do good work for the community!  Kevin didn't get paid and yet spent countless hours making sure that it was a ceremony that would touch the hearts and minds of those who attended. 

Myself and a group of colleagues put on a memorial service for Father's Day, Mother's Day and Christmas - of our own free will, raising our own funds in order to do something for the community. 

Many of us volunteer and conduct ceremonies for Relay for Life (Cancer Victoria) and many other community functions. 

A civil celebrant understands ceremony - it is what we do! 

Why then, do the powers that be, completely overlook us? 

The community needs to understand that we are more than willing to help our society in any way we can, but often we don't even know about it until it is too late.

So if you have a community occasion coming up - ask a celebrant to help, someone who understands the power of ceremony. 

A Meditation for Those Left behind . . . .

Author: Robyn O'Connell

We must not, and should not, forget that for some the hurt will never go away.

It’s here again,
where did that time go!
There’s a hole in my heart,
though no one would know

Strangers see me walking
and talking like normal folk do
But they can’t see what is inside,
a heart that is still broken in two

Yes I go on with life
and I try to hide my pain
Even if I told others of it
what good would it gain?

Sometimes I tire of the pity
or the ‘oh sorry’ they say
Their life too
could change in just one day

Don’t think I have forgotten
Even though it’s been so long
You come to mind so easily
Even listening to a song

And so few will know the pain on days like this
or the ache that always stays
Because sometimes it is not just this time of year
but so many of my days.

Robyn O'Connell CMC, Dip MC, FC, Cert IV in Training & Assessment
Celebrant, Author, Funeral Celebrant Trainer & Workplace Trainer
Silver Celebrants
P O Box 5116, Ringwood, Vic, 3134 Tel:  (03) 9005 7175  Mob:  0425 726 246
Email:  This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Find our more about Robyn on www.silvercelebrants.com.au  

Member: Celebrants & Celebrants Network Australia
Member: The Celebrants Network Incorporated

"And can it be, that in a world so full and busy, the loss of one creature, makes a void so wide and deep that nothing but the width and depth of eternity can fill it up!"  Charles Dickens

A celebrant friend  did a talk on Rituals in Modern Society for a local club.

As the session progressed, it became apparent that the group had little idea of the role of a civil celebrant.

"And how do you go about planning the reception?" was one question, indicating a confusion with wedding planners.

My friend's response "Would you ask that question of a minister or priest?"