More people are opting for Memorials for their loved ones instead of a funeral service, so it begs the question - What is a Memorial Service and how does it differ from a traditional Funeral Ceremony? Celebrant Leslie Ridgeway from Ocean Grove in Victoria is going to take is through the details....

We are certainly living in a strange time where some of us at sometime this year have been or will be denied access to our loved ones when they are sick, dying or have passed away.  Today we have Celebrant Susanna Jose from Canberra, ACT sharing her own personal story...

Are you like many people in Australia who find that talking about death is still a bit of an uncomfortable topic?  Celebrant Sonia Collins from Batemans Bay, NSW talks to us about Dying to Know Day.

Online ceremonies cannot replace the face to face connection we often yearn for when someone we love dies. However, while the Covid-19 and travel restrictions are in place, this style of ceremony does allow us a means to connect and engage with family and friends, locally or overseas, in a meaningful way to share stories, laughter and tears together and to say farewell.

Today’s blog is written by Celebrant, trainer, author and all round lovely lady, Wendy Haynes.

The Australian government has set strict limits on numbers at funerals as part of the effort to contain the Coronavirus - COVID19.  There is currently a limit of 10 people at any funeral – and that includes the celebrant and the Funeral Director’s staff. (Note:  since this article was written in early April, the number has increased to 10 mourners plus celebrant and FD staff - these rules are likely to continue to change over the coming months) 

Social distancing must be in place so offering comfort is difficult.  We all understand the reasons for these limitations but they can be very hard for families, friends and colleagues to come to terms with.  

Sonia Collins - Marriage and Funeral Celebrant, regular blogger and Chairperson of The Celebrants Network, takes a look at new ways to say our last goodbyes during this current pandemic.

On November 11 Australia, along with all Commonwealth countries will honour Remembrance Day in recognition of the day the guns fell silent at the end of World War One. After four years of warfare and the loss of millions of lives, an armistice was signed to take effect on the 11^th hour of the 11^th day of November, 1918.

Today we have our regular guest blogger Melanie Lawson from Oberon, NSW, recognising Remembrance Day. 

As I walked through the supermarket today I noticed the pumpkins and other goodies ready for the annual Halloween celebrations.  The modern rituals of Halloween - carving the pumpkins into lanterns, dressing up as ghosts and witches and trick or treating are now very common in Australia but not many people are aware of the origins.

TCN Celebrant and today's guest and regular blogger Sonia Collins from Batemans Bay, NSW talks about the Remembering Our Loved Ones. 

DTK Day is on 8th August 2019. To quote the Dying to Know Day website "Too many of us are dying in a way not consistent with our values or wishes. Too often, we feel ill-equipped to support loved ones who are dying, caring or grieving. Dying to Know Day is designed to change this by activating conversations and curiosity."

Australians recognise the 25th of April as a day of national remembrance, which takes two forms. Commemorative services are held across the nation at dawn and commemorative ceremonies held at war memorials around the country.  Today's blog is written by TCN Member, Trish Keating.

The 11th of November is Remembrance Day.  This is the day we pay our respects to those soldiers who died in the First World War.  It marks the day the war ended and at 11am on the 11th day of the 11th month we observe a minute silence to remember and think about all the people who have died in wars since.  There are lots of ways to remember our loved ones after they've died - here are just a few ideas...

"People do not die for us immediately but remain bathed in a sort of aura of life which bears no relation to true immortality but through which they continue to occupy our thoughts in the same way as when they were alive. It is as though they were traveling abroad." Marcel Proust

The death of those closest to us presents challenges not imagined, even though death is a natural part of life the sadness, grief, shock and confusion that may present itself at the time may feel like it will never go away...

For Dying to Know Day - today Monday 8th August 2016 - TCN would like to encourage everyone to talk about death and particularly funerals and memorials.  What questions would you like answered by TCN and our celebrant members?

To start the conversation, here are some questions our TCN celebrant members have been asked:

Must we organise a funeral within a few days of a person's death?

Are there any laws we need to know, if we want to organise our own 'send-off'?

Can we have both a funeral and a memorial?

Am I able to pre-plan my funeral ceremony?

How can our family give a loved one a fitting tribute, but not cost us 'an arm and a leg"?

Can we have a religious funeral ceremony and a civil memorial some time later?

Can we include religious material in a civil funeral?

Our parent does not want any fuss, and tells us not to have a funeral. However we feel uncomfortable about that. What can we do?

If we are not church goers, and do not want to use a funeral chapel, what other venues could we use?

Do we have to have a "Celebration of Life", if our family member was a rather difficult character who caused more pain than joy?

If we were considering a "Do It Yourself" funeral or memorial, what tips do you have for us?

How can we get mum or dad to discuss what they want us to do, when they die?

How can we get our adult children to talk with us - anytime we try they seem to brush the topic to one side?

The Celebrants Network (TCN) invites you to ask these questions and more!

You may ask a question via our Blog Comments Section at the bottom of this blog - anytime today or tonight.

In fact, if you are too busy today, then ask when you can.

It's very easy to do.

However, if you have any hassles, please feel free to contact us.

The Celebrants Network (TCN) has created a special Dying to Know Section for your information, in addition to our Ceremonies for loss and grief Section for Everyone.

What have you done to farewell a family member or friend?

You are also invited to share your experiences here with us.

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It seems in recent times, more families, who would normally be choosing a civil funeral service, are having a private service or even a simple viewing to say 'goodbye' to their loved one, then organising a Memorial for the wider circle of family and friends a few weeks later. 

There may be many good reasons for taking this approach.

Flexibility with timing for the ceremony

Having a Memorial a few weeks after the death, gives extra time for planning the ceremony and more choice of day of the week, time of day, length and content of the ceremony, and location.  This flexibility can be very useful where family and friends are overseas or interstate.

The family can take time to find a civil celebrant who suits the style of tribute the family wants.  Civil celebrants are very flexible about the arrangements and will encourage family members to be involved in planning the ceremony and actively participating in it.

Consideration of Costs 

You may have a beautiful urn or hand crafted box with the deceased’s ashes as a focal point.  You may have a favourite photo, or display of personal items in place.

?Click on the word "Comment" and go for it!

? Don't forget to subscribe ? to this blog - the "subscribe" button is up the top of the page ⇞⇞⇞ and the blog will magically ?? appear in your email inbox ?.

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If you're unsure how to go about starting this type of converstaion, there are people that can help you, like the organisation called: Death Over Dinner who recently featured on Ch 10's The Project who do exactly that - helping people to have that awkward conversation about your dying wishes.

You could also contact one of our wonderful TCN Funeral Celebrants to help you with ideas.

READ MORE about pre-funerals planning here.

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Thank you for joining us....

?? We would love it if you would let us know what you think ?.  

There is a comment section ? at the bottom ⬇ of the blog for you to do just that.  

?Click on the word "Comment" and go for it!

? Don't forget to subscribe ? to this blog - the "subscribe" button is up the top of the page ⇞⇞⇞ and the blog will magically ?? appear in your email inbox ?.

Also please feel free to share ? our blog on your social media ? so we can spread the love ?! 

Please use this ? link: https://www.celebrations.org.au/blog when you share. ?

This next snippet was on a friend's Facebook page today.....

"A lovely military man selling poppies stopped me today and asked if he could re-position mine - while doing so he told me that women should wear their poppy on their right side; the red represents the blood of all those who gave their lives, the black represents the mourning of those who didn't have their loved ones return home, and the green leaf represents the grass and crops growing and future prosperity after the war destroyed so much. The leaf should be positioned at 11 o'clock to represent the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month, the time that World War One formally ended. He was worried that younger generations wouldn't understand this and his generation wouldn't be around for much longer to teach them."

Lest we forget...

Talk to one of our celebrants who can assist you with preparing a ceremony.

As Christmas approaches, my heart goes out to the countless number of bereaved parents who maybe facing their first, second, third, 20th or even 50th Christmas without their precious child.

Some will have died as babies, children, teenagers or adults, their age is irrelevant, just as how long ago it was.  Some would have died through illness, car accidents or may have even made a decision to take their own life.  Whatever the reason or cause the result is the same, their parents face Christmas without them.

Those who have not had this experience are probably thinking, “30 years ago?  You’re holding onto the past, you should be over it by now”.  But the truth is, just as in life, your child is yours for all time, whether they are alive or not – they are still a part of the family you love.

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A Day of Hope

Recently I visited a young family who had lost their second son at 3 months; he had caught a virus at 6 days and 11 weeks later he passed away, at home, surrounded by his loving family.  The family had contacted me to conduct his Memorial service on Monday 19^th August. 

The family is having a pagoda constructed in the backyard and planting a Japanese maple beside it during the Memorial Service and the mulch will be stones with messages from family and friends loving placed.  A visual reminder of their son’s life. So I thought that they chose this date as the construction would be complete by then.

Asking why this particular day, I was told “this is a Day of Hope, and we wish to support this initiative by Carly Marie.  Check out the website www.carlymarieprojectheal.com.au.” When I arrived home I checked this webpage. 

From Rebecca Skinner
Celebrants & Celebrations Network Australia & TCN Inc Member
www.celebratinglifeschapters.com/‎

'Ethical Wills' are a Jewish tradition and the Hebrew Bible first described them 3,000 years ago (Genesis Ch.49).

Ethical Wills, which are not legal documents, can be either the life story of a person, the lessons they have learnt and wish to pass on or even their dreams and wishes for family members.

Lest We Forget

25^th April Australia remembers.

At the days dawn commemorative services are held across the nation and later ex-servicemen and women meet and march through our towns and cities to the War Memorials where commemorative services are held.  In these ways, ANZAC Day is a time for reflection on the many different meanings of war.

Let us also take time out to remember, support and honour all those fine young men and woman who have served their country in all theatres of war and returned home.  You cannot always see the wounds inflicted in war and today as we bow our heads in silence let us say thank you for the sacrifices made by those who have served.

It is traditional for sprigs of rosemary to be worn on ANZAC Day as this beautiful aromatic herb is found growing wild on the Gallipoli peninsula.  So visit your herb garden, trim the rosemary and share with your family and friends when you remember, honour and support our Servicemen and women.

As they march in time by Janice Woolrych

Remember the ANZAC’s in your hearts

Your thoughts and your prayers

As we share this ANZAC Day

As they march in time.

Remember the serving men and woman as you watch

Those gallant veterans march in time.

Left right left, eyes right, eyes front, left right left.

Those veterans grow older and slower

As they march in time.

Remember the ANZAC’s….

Remember them in your hearts. 

As they march in time.

Remember those serving  

Left right left ..... as they march in time.

If we remember them,

They will continue to march in time.

Lest We Forget.

“A Loving Heart is the Truest Wisdom ..” Charles Dickens
Free On-Line Memorials in our "In Memory Of" section

Introducing ASKACELEBRANT''s newest section "In Memory Of" on our www.celebrants.org.au website.

Do you have a loved one or friend, or respect a community member for whom you would like to make a tribute for their life?

Every day there are short poppies that stand tall in the lives of families and communities who never receive a public acknowledge in the "Obits" of even the local papers. ASKACELEBRANT wants to hear some of their stories.

The third Celebrant initiated Community Memorial Service was held on Wednesday 5th December in Ferntree Gully, Melbourne.  Robyn O'Connell, Funeral Celebrant, headed up a small, but dedicated team of celebrants to once again organise a memorial service for the community in Melbourne. 

2012 saw the first celebrant organised Mother's Day and Father's Day Services, and now a Christmas Service "Reflect ~ Remember" can be added to the list. 

Several highly respected celebrants dedicated their time to share their feelings and help those in our community, who find Christmas

Losing a loved one to death is hard. That loved one's absence is obvious - especially on those occasions when family and friends come together to celebrate their birthdays, anniversaries, shared beliefs or shared community times set aside for holidays.

Such times can be very lonely for those whose depth of grief is still acute. Being sad amongst others who are contented and happy can make that loneliness particularly painful.

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