We all love to see expressions of delight when we make a love gesture a surprise!
But there is a reason why you can't surprise your partner with a legal wedding...
It is law in Australia that both parties to the marriage must give their consent to getting married. Marriage is a legal contract which is why we have a one month notice (cooling off period) so that everyone can make a fully informed decision. Also, people need to be psychologically prepared to be the focus of attention, even if it is for a short while, by knowing they are going to a party or an event.
The Celebrants Network does not recommend “total” surprises for anyone. The surprise can be part of the event, not the whole event.
Marriage Ceremonies
Under no circumstances can either party to a marriage be surprised about their own wedding, but they can spring the event on their guests.
Things to consider:
- parents, grandparents & other family members might be unhappy about not being involved in the planning
- guests love the anticipation of a wedding and may want some notice to dress accordingly
- think of all the offers of help you might be foregoing
Other ceremonies
A common request celebrants have is for a "Surprise Renewal of Vows" - while there is no legal baring on this type of ceremony, you might still consider your partner when putting them on the spot to renew their vows no matter how convinced you are about the strength of your relationship. Perhaps you could call it a 'Suprise Anniversary Celebration' - with no pressure on them to make public promises.
Other ceremonies such as a "Surprise Birthday" are a little different. You are still putting the guest of honour on the spot, but you could plan it like a "This is your life" then they don't need to say anything.
Your Celebrant can offer more ideas and throughts about making a celebration a surprise.